28

GUESS WHAT GUYS?! It’s my birthday today! I was thinking of doing a deep ‘n’ meaningful style post similar to last year’s one, about the woes of turning 28. But I kind of ran out of time and didn’t want to sound too miserable, so instead I decided to write a semi-deep-‘n’-meaningful list of things 28 I’ve learnt in my now 28 years of living. Hoping you all enjoy!

1. What you think about, you attract into your life, whether you want it or not. For example, if you go round saying that “men are trash”, you meet men who are in fact, trash. A positive mindset is key

2. On the same lines, people like positive people, so if you need to have a good moan save it for your best friend, family, or therapist. Say it too the wider group or on social media, and you’ll just get labelled a complainer

3. If a guy likes you back, you’ll know. If you’re putting out the signals and you seem to be hitting a brick wall, it’s time to move on

4. The super-confident or handsome guys have the most immediate appeal, but keep an open mind and get to know everyone. Sometimes the “attractive” ones turn out to be not that great, and vice versa

5. A key thing to look for in any relationship, romantic or platonic, is kindness. Someone who is rude to or about other people will be willing to do the same to you. It’s the sweet ones you have to go for

6. Higher education isn’t for everyone. It’s expensive and most courses are a complete waste of time. Look into apprenticeships and school leaver schemes instead

7. Not everyone has to have a high-powered career. If there’s nothing you’re particularly passionate about, it’s fine to have a job that pays the bills and have other passions. It’s fine to become a stay-at-home mother or father

8. A work-life balance is key. There’s no point sticking it out in a job you can’t stand because it looks good on paper, especially if the hours are killing you. A short commute, shorter working hours, and a low-pressure environment are massively underrated

9. Be careful about which jobs you accept, particularly when you’re starting out. It means nothing to them if they take you on, realise they don’t need you, and spit you out after a few weeks, but it’s bloody annoying for you if you have rent to pay. Avoid start-ups and companies that seem a bit flaky like the plague

10. If you want to be a blogger, don’t just churn out content. Go on social media, talk to people, comment on other people’s blogs, go to events. That’s how you build a following

11. Having said that though, content is king. The key to success is finding your niche and posting stuff that people want to read. To be honest, I don’t even think I’ve fully found mine

12. It’s OK if your opinion differs to other people’s

13. However, avoid getting into arguments with people on social media. Let’s face it, you’re probably right, but having circular debates about it on Twitter is a massive time suck. There’s a point where you have to just mute the thread and move on with your life

14. Another point re social media: sure, express your opinion. Sometimes you’d be surprised at how many people agree with you. But be careful what you put in writing; a thoughtless flippant remark can be screenshotted and used against you

15. Try and avoid taking a tribalistic approach to politics. People on “the other side” aren’t all bad

16. Similar to my earlier point, try and avoid getting into arguments about politics in real life too. Discussions, great. But some people just aren’t interested in learning, so limit the political chat to certain circles

17. Sadly, people can overlook a whole host of flaws in a person, but if you come across as shy or quiet, people treat you differently. I’m still in the process of improving my personality

18. The flip side of this is, give the quieter people a chance. They usually end up being nicer

19. Recognise and hang onto good friends. They aren’t all that common, so make sure to make time for them

20. Don’t jump into a friendship too quickly. If they have a pure heart, that’s fine, but some people are self-absorbed or downright psychotic, so best to keep it on a casual basis to begin with and screen them before you let them into your inner circle

21. Cut off anyone who treats you poorly. You don’t heave to deal with being treated like a back-up option and flaked on last minute

22. If someone disappears on you (ie. makes a plan with you then doesn’t show up, and doesn’t tell you they’re not coming anymore), don’t see them again

23. Sometimes people drift off, and friendships grow apart. That’s OK. Don’t chase anyone who isn’t reciprocating your interest to hang out

24. With online dating and dating apps, sometimes it’s a good idea to be a bit more picky in who you meet. Scattergun dating doesn’t work

25. Don’t look for a massive spark or perfection on date 1, sometimes people can grow on you

26. If a guy says he’s not looking for anything serious, it means he’s not looking for anything serious WITH YOU. Those guys usually end up in relationships shortly afterwards, so as soon as you hear it keep moving

27. Eat healthily, drink water, get plenty of sleep, and exercise. Binge drinking and fast food might feel good at the time, but it makes you feel worse in the long run

28. And finally, always show gratitude. You’re exactly where you need to be right now, and things will get better

If you fancy giving me a birthday present, please instead donate to my charity fundraising page! It’s been edited so the money now goes directly to the charity, so please donate/ share!